K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Randomize
