..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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