Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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