he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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