no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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