She said her name was "party"
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
