Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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