You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
You left your phone here
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