I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
