So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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