You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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