Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
home. puking in laundry basket.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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