McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
