Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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