i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize