This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
3 2 1 whiskey
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
