Ambien. No doubt about it.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
