Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
