Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
two words...techno handjob
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize