i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize