When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
