Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize