do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize