How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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