do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
