I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
