Are we in a gay sports bar?
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize