those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
