I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
