Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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