my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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