If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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