The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
