just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
