so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
