Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize