on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize