Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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