he wants to bone in the snuggie
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
