dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
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