I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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