Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
