you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
