I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
