my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
