They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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