OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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