I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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