i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
