He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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